Wednesday, February 5, 2014
GRIEF: Talking with Christina Rasmussen
Author Christina Rasmussen is a leader in bringing the topic of Grief to the table. Because the topic is a painful one, people shy away from open, honest dialogue or discussion whether it be face-to-face or on social media. Christina is hoping to help healing by dealing; dealing with grief in an open and honest way. I have always felt the only true way to heal and grow as an individual is through accountability and honestly, with oneself and others. She and I share this same philosophy.
Her book, Second Firsts is a tale of HOPE. A lesson or example that there is indeed life after loss. I reviewed the book when it was released but I also had a chance to chat with Christina about her experiences and how it has influenced her current path.
LG: What inspired you to share your story?
CR: After my husband died, my world was truly and utterly shattered. I had two young daughters to take care of, a job I hated and I was pretty much ‘homeless’, in the sense that I had to start from the bottom up. It was a very difficult time for all three of us. It wasn’t until two years later, after living day-to-day, not happy, that I entered my second first life. I quit the job I hated, I went on a first date with an amazing man and I started doing things that made me happy. I wanted to help others who are going through what I went through, to help them move forward and heal… and show them that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
LG: Explain the unviersality of the "Life RE-Entry Model" for ANYONE that is grieving, not just those who have lost a spouse.
CR: Grief can result from a number of different losses; it can be for a physical loss, emotional loss, or what I call an invisible loss, such as an unrealized goal or dream. My Reentry model helps people live their best lives after any of these losses. Reentry is a five step model that helps people move forward and get back to living their best lives . Most people who have been through invisible losses don’t even realize it, nor do they realize that they are experiencing a form of grief. They don’t realize that there is an extraordinary life waiting for them ahead - they just need the tools to get there.
LG: What is the absolute FIRST STEP in the healing process, in your opinion?
CR: The first step is being real with yourself. Coming to terms with the fact that the loss happened is a big step. Being honest is huge. Once you are real and honest with yourself, the door will open and the healing process begins. It’s a difficult step, make no mistake, but it is possible.
LG: I love the concept of "Plug into your life" - I feel it can be applied to ANY life, not just after loss. Your thoughts?
CR: Absolutely! Like I mentioned earlier, the word ‘loss’ is somewhat a misconception. People automatically associate it with physical losses. There are all different types of losses and this is why my second step of Reentry, “Plug into your life,” can be applied to many different lives. The concept involves stopping the procrastination of taking action and actually doing something, taking action, moving forward. Essentially taking steps to plug into your new life. I go into great detail on how to do this in my book.
LG: If you had just ONE piece of advice for my grieving readers who feel lost, what would it be?
CR: Sing in the shower again. Period. As silly as it may sound, after loss people forget to do little things like this again. Singing should make you feel happy and make you smile.. and even feel free to laugh at yourself while doing it!
Are you dealing with grief and want a new life?
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